Apparently women “complain about men” and it’s “always their fault”, never the man’s

Here we go again… This is so absurd, that I want to vomit. Anyways, let’s commentate on this cringe fest. I will focusing on two posts I found on Reddit. The first one I’ll be looking at is from r/TrueUnpopularOpinion, which ironically the following “opinion” is far from unpopular:

”When I was younger (33m), I used to sympathize with women complaining about their men not being active and engaged partners. For example, men not wanting to help with working on the house, decorating, buying furniture, not wanting to help pick out clothes for the kids or join in on family outings, gardening, etc. I always thought that these men were lazy and complacent and I couldn’t understand how they could not want to be involved in every aspect of their family dynamics.

Now as a married man with children and a wife I totally get it. I hear friends wives complain loudly that their spouses don’t help them with their various projects or that if they do they’re disinterested and seem annoyed. What they fail to see is the part they play in it.”

What part? What fucking part do women have to play in according to men? We already are playing our part, we’re the ones birthing the kids and taking care of them. You suddenly lose sympathy for women once a woman holds you or your friends accountable.

”Every single time I hear someone complain about this I cringe because it is so obvious the woman has driven the man to this point. They constantly criticize and complain and demand perfection to the point that it takes all the joy of doing these tasks away completely.”

Let me ask you something: why do you think only women are complaining? So apparently, men don’t complain at all? It’s hilarious how you say you cringe at complainers (aka women), yet this is the exact same shit you’re doing right now, criticizing women who call out their lazy spouses and policing them for having standards.

”I’ve literally seen a man spend an entire day working on painting and decorating a bedroom for his child only for his wife to say it’s not right and say they have to do it over.”

Explain. Why did his wife tell him that? Could she be having a baby? If so, she couldn’t have done it herself as pregnancy is a pain in the ass. Could the family be moving into a new house? If so, perhaps she was asking him to take part in one room while she does another. Or maybe does the dude simply suck at painting, aka leave messes on the floor or being incongruently sloppy? EXPLAIN!!

“I know another man whose wife was so particular about her child’s clothes she made her husband return several outfits he picked out because she didn’t like them. Then she had the audacity to complain about how she has to do all the shopping for the kids clothes!”

Again, explain. Why does the wife not like the particular clothes? Is it because the clothes were too big or small? Were they dirty or torn? Were they made out of a specific material that their child could be allergic to? And no fucking shit she’s the one who has to do all the shopping, she’s the goddamn housewife, she has to pick up all the groceries in one day, while her husband clearly doesn’t give a shit if his kid walks out in public naked.

”Another man I know refuses to do the “cutesy” holiday stuff with his wife anymore despite her protests. What she fails to mention is the last time they did she spent the entire time being a nightmare (we were there) and complaining about getting perfect photos and getting angry over the children’s outfits.”

Again, you’re not explaining! You claim to say you were there with that couple yet you are so vague regarding the actual details of the incident and only tend to highlight those that support your bullshit generalizations! Speaking of which, clothes are fucking expensive, especially if you’re at the mall! I can sympathize with the wife for being picky with what type of clothes, especially since she’s the one paying for them. Same goes for the photo shoots. You have photo albums for a reason. It is also difficult as fuck to primp up and take a decent family photo.

”Personally, I know my own wife is always asking my opinion on décor but I’ve completely given up because every single thing I’ve suggested she’s shot down and acted like it’s a stupid idea. Deep down, I think many women just aren’t willing to accept the fact that they play a large part in their spouses attitudes but they need to if they want them to change.”

Women are not responsible for men’s stubbornness. Women have been putting up with lazy spouses for god knows how long and suddenly having standards and calling them out is a problem only applied to women? Not only do you admit that you hate your wife but you also blame your problems onto her and other women! Ffs, you were the one who proposed to her and knocked her up, and yet it’s still her fault!

Here are some of the comments from that particular post:

”It’s a real and awkward trend that many women have grown very comfortable brow beating and belittling the men in their life and they seem unaware of the damage it does.”

”My wife and I went to a lot of marriage counselling to resolve this. It worked. My wife learned this behaviour from her mother. She has since told me she would be horrified if she taught our kids to have that dynamic in their future relationships. She just didn’t see it previously.

The part men play is that we don’t communicate like women. When we’re criticised we don’t immediately break down crying and spend a few hours talking about how the criticism makes us feel. My wife has admitted that that would have resonated with her, but it’s just not how I communicate. I am better now at communicating in ways she understands, but I’ll never be a woman. We’ve reached a healthy equilibrium.”

The lady in the next following comment lampshades how she’s not like other women:

”Thank you for writing this. You put into words what I have been seeing with my own parents.

My mother always bitch at my father for exactly all the things you said until he simply shut down and let her do her thing. Then she complains he never gives his opinion or help around the house. As their only daughter I grew up watching that dynamic and thinking my father didn't do enough. Now I'm on his side and it's crazy to see the damage my mother did to us both because I'm now firmly on my dad's side.

I have now swore to never be like that. I think I'm on the right track as my mother says I'm just like my dad :)”

Here’s the reply the OP gave her:

”This is the exact scenario I’m referring to. I’m not a misogynist, I just believe women and men are equal and therefore should be held equally responsible for there failures in relationships. I feel like our society is so quick to blame everything on the stereotypical “lazy, slob” of a husband without once looking at the other half of the equation.”

”Ha. My wife asks me to choose between A or B. I compare and contrast both, giving a reasoned explanation about how A is ultimately better in most respects. She chooses B every time. I've stopped giving my opinion and now she complains about it. 😄”

Now here’s the second post, this one is from r/PurplePillDebate, which is actually just a red pill forum disguised as a centrist platform:

”Society generally expects men to take care of themselves. That doesn't mean that a man can never ask for help, but at a certain point, people will just tell him to "man up" and do it himself. There simply isn't very much tolerance or sympathy for a man who doesn't put in the work himself to get what he wants. Being louder and more annoying about something won't get him anywhere or win him any favors.”

Taking care of yourself is not exclusive to men. Also no one expects men to take care of themselves, it’s their choice whether they want to or not. The only people I hear that tells men to “man up” are always other men. No sympathy for men? Lol give me a fucking break! EVERYONE sympathizes with men, especially those that are rich and white! They are treated as the default so of fucking course they will be sympathized! You can be as loud and annoying as you want as long as you have a privilege!

“Society on the other hand does not have the same expectations about women. Quite the contrary, society usually expects men to take care of women, and will often find ways to shame men for not helping them (like forcing a man to stand up or move to the back of the bus so a woman can sit down).”

Dead wrong! In reality, society has high expectations for women, such as appearance, capability, movements, etc. The reason men are “expected” to take care of women is because in the old days, women didn’t have the rights regarding independence compared to men. No one is shaming men for not helping their wives, they are simply told to share the work and they made the choice to not participate. Regarding the bus situation, are you saying you’d rather be a selfish cunt by forcing a pregnant lady to not take a seat despite the grueling pains of child labor?

“The reason why women seem to whine /complain / nag so often is because it works for them. Men learn very quickly in life that throwing temper tantrums and complaining about things only gets them so far. If they really want something, they either have to do it themselves, or decide that it's not worth it.”

Because it is the ONLY WAY women are going to be listened to regarding stubborn men. If men had simply just done the thing they are told the very first time we tell them, we wouldn’t be having this kind of drama, would we? But no, men remain selfish and lazy and then gain the opportunity to demonize their wives immediately after they hit their breaking point. Because nothing is men’s fault, according to them.

“Women on the other hand very rarely have to make that kind of decision. If they can't (or don't want to) do something, they can just complain about it enough, around the right people, and someone else will do it for them. This is where their sense of entitlement and arrogance comes from, this is where nagging comes from, and this is why they get so upset when people don't go out of their way and treat them special all the time.”

BECAUSE WE ARE THE ONES DOING ALL THE HOUSEWORK AND TAKING CARE OF THE FUCKING CHILDREN!!! Also you are contradicting yourself there. You say women don’t have to make any choices yet you also say women will complain about something if they “don’t want to do it”. That right here, is making a decision! Moving on, women aren’t going to go around whining to whoever they want so they can turn them into slaves. We simply can’t carry all the burdens weighing down our shoulders. Women have their limits as well. It is thoughtful to help remove some of these burdens by helping them out. That’s simply what we’re supposed to do!

“Nagging” is not entitlement or arrogance. It is simply putting your foot down and saying “enough is enough”. Women don’t get “special treatment” because we are treated like shit by men who think they can place themselves on a pedestal! But do you know who IS entitled and arrogant and want “special treatment”? It’s men who think they can world owes them a living, throws a fucking fit when they’re called out or being held accountable, and act like women know nothing and are simply below them all while constantly belittling us and holding a victim mentality just because we have standards!

Ladies, if you hear a man who says shit like that, call him out for it! Don’t buy his “society hates men” agenda, and never apologize for having a voice!