BANGLADESH: My Father Believed in Me Before I Was Born. That Changed Everything for Me.

Mosfeka shares how her father’s love and willingness to defy tradition shaped her into a leader for herself and every girl fighting to be seen and heard.

I am not just a girl; I am a woman who carries the legacy of a father who believed in equality, empowerment, and the collective power of human dignity.

Before I was born, everyone hoped for a boy except for my father. Defying society's norms, before my birth, he named me Kamal Mahmud – traditionally a man’s name. When I was born, my father took me in his arms and called me "my own tigress." 

As I heard this story growing up, I asked my father, "Why did you call me that? You know I’m afraid of cockroaches!" He laughed and responded, "What the world says is not my headache. I know you're my tigress."

My father, a professor who studied at Dhaka University, was the first person from our village to attend this prestigious institution. Despite his accomplishments, he remained humble and grounded. He always stood beside underprivileged students, empowering girls and supporting their education. He never treated me like a typical girl; he called me "Abba." I once questioned why he called me that instead of "Ma." He explained, "In our society, men are raised with dignity. They are empowered to take responsibility. But I know you are my tigress. You will take on responsibilities like a man."

At a young age, I didn’t fully understand my father’s words. But life soon forced me to grow up quickly. When I was only five, my father became mentally unstable due to Alzheimer's Disease. Suddenly, the responsibility of caring for my younger sister, managing the household, and making sure we had food fell on my small shoulders. With my mother working to earn a living, I became the caretaker, grocery shopper, and cook for my family.

At 20, I lost my father, and shortly after, my mother lost her job. The entire family depended on me, and I had no choice but to take charge. I started my own clothing business and worked part-time to continue my studies and support my family.

Looking back now, I understand why my father always called me his tigress and referred to me as "Abba." Even though I don't see myself as a tigress and sometimes feel overwhelmed by the weight of my responsibilities, I take pride in knowing I am the daughter of a progressive father who believed in empowering his daughter to stand strong and rise above every challenge.

My father’s vision was to raise me as a human, not limited by gender or societal expectations. He showed me that the true strength lies in embracing responsibility, regardless of gender, and that our true power comes from within.

My father’s actions and beliefs were a lesson in how individual struggles and societal distractions can be transformed into collective empowerment. He believed that by empowering one person — his daughter — he could set a ripple effect that would contribute to the betterment of society. His progressive outlook and faith in me have shaped who I am today. His vision helped me break free from the distraction of gendered roles, to claim my place as a leader, a caregiver, and a changemaker in my community. 

I am not just a girl; I am a woman who carries the legacy of a father who believed in equality, empowerment, and the collective power of human dignity. And I will continue to rise, not just for myself but for all the women and girls still fighting to be seen and heard.

STORY AWARDS

This story was published as part of World Pulse's Story Awards program. We believe every woman has a story to share, and that the world will be a better place when women are heard.