Does she not fucking understand that this supposed to be “punching up” humor?

Here’s a commentary I’d like to make regarding a satire book called “Boys are Stupid… Throw Rocks at Them!”, which the author is a man.

The commentator in question however is a woman:

“A friend of mine had the saying above on a T-shirt with an angry little cartoon-ish girl getting ready to toss a rock… this saying has stuck with me for years and years… On the surface it’s a cute shirt, but looking deeper, it’s 50% a true statement! Boys ARE dumb… I wouldn’t go as far as throwing rocks at them, but a good shake now and then wouldn’t hurt…”

It’s supposed to be satirical and a “take that!” to male-dominated media. What more do you want?

”This is advice about ALL men, not just boyfriends or husbands, but colleagues, bosses, employees, friends, brothers and fathers too…

My brother is the single most evolved male on this planet, to the point he spells woman with a Y, womyn…! But he’s still thick as a brick sometimes.”

I am legitimately concerned about your brother right now. Hasn’t he gone to school, like at all?

”We need to stop expecting, to stop assuming, to stop playing games, to stop insinuating and start being clear. If he asks you, “what’s wrong?” our usual reply would be a flat “Nothing, I’m fine” and expect him to read into that, to think, ‘nope, something’s wrong, I better look back on the past few days and come up with the reason’… because he’s just going to hear “Nothing, I’m fine” and is going to walk away, relieved, and carry on with his day. When we are asked “What’s wrong?” we NEED to be specific, to tell him what is bothering us in the clearest most simple terms possible. If he knows something is wrong he will move heaven and earth to make it better…”

Except being direct with men doesn’t fucking work. If we DO tell them something is wrong, they will say we’re overreacting or on our periods or some stupid shit.

”Some of the best advice I ever received was from one of my uncles, Nosher Uncle, or Nasia, in India, granted he was telling me this because I, as a Canadian girl with English as my first language, spoke way too fast for him, and he wanted me to slow down… but it really does apply here… and it comes from… yep, you guessed it… A BOY! He said “Speak S-L-O-W-L-Y, Clearly and Distinctly” and the ‘distinctly’ was always pronounced ever so, ummm… distincTly!”

Does he not realize that some people struggle with talking slow and clear? I’ve had the exact same issue with my dad, who would these days keep telling me to speak louder and slower, despite the fact he ironically got mad if I spoke loudly. That man is seriously unaware of the irony.

”It’s not that these boys don’t WANT to help, to understand, to ‘get it’, their brains just don’t function like ours do… He did ask you what’s wrong because he genuinely does care, he felt something was up and took the time to ask… if you leave it open and unclear, or expect him to read your mind when your words are quoting a separate book, well then mi’lady, it’s your fault and not his!”

So why the fuck should us women force ourselves to cater toward men’s needs despite the double standards they give us? We tried being clear but they got offended over how direct we are just because we’re women. They called us aggressive, bitchy, coldhearted, rude, whatever insult they can pull out of their ass. How is it women’s fault when men undermine us for being direct and then blame us for being indirect?

”Now that I’ve read this through I’ve come to the realization that honestly… IT’S US GIRLS THAT ARE REALLY DUMB!!!!!

Boys, I promise to try harder from now on…”

Try harder on WHAT?! Girl, you cannot be fucking serious! We dealt with sexism and double standards and somehow WE are the stupid ones?! So we’re stupid because we have to put up with a bunch of bullshit, and finally decide “fuck it!” but then get demonized for doing the exact opposite?

Women seriously can never win.

”Boys and girls are equally stupid sometimes. But it is not okay to throw rocks at anyone.”

Lady, do you not fucking get satire?!