Light or Darkness? What Awaits?

She lay awake thinking what she had been thinking about for a good part of her life. She had just turned 53, her children now independent adults, and she felt she needed a change in her life. She had been thinking about his for a long time, but always found an excuse to postpone her decision.

“It is now or never,” she thought to herself. The next morning, she walked into her employer’s office and handed in her letter of resignation.

For two years she had studied for a diploma in counselling, and was dying for an opportunity to put what she had learned into practise. She always loved to help people, and thought with her diploma she now had the formal right and knowledge to do so.

So when the government announced it was looking for social workers and counsellors, to help those affected by the post election violence, she knew this was the opportunity she was looking for.

Like all Kenyans she was a victim of the violence. Her property and that of her husband had gone up in flames, during the elections. Her husband had been confronted with violence, and there was a day he was held hostage for a few hours in town, not able to go back home as early as he always did due to the violence. Yes she had been affected on a personal level.

Her letter from the government came in one morning. She had been posted as a counsellor in one of the camps, for internally displaced persons.

I knew about the camp, my friends and I had a chance of visiting that camp once before. The people were lost and hurt, we sat down with them and listened to their stories, we carried some food for them, and played with the children, but when we left we felt we had not done anything for them. Yes, we made the children laugh, for a few minutes, and gave the adults and opportunity to vent, we encouraged the youth, but when we left I felt like we were abandoning them back to their sorrow. A few hours with them, a few loafs of bread was not want they needed.

So when she told me she had been posted to that camp I was excited, I knew the people needed help. But on her first day, she realised, there was a lot of work that needed to be done, the anger and hate was deep.

She was violently confronted by those she had come to help, because her name confirmed that she was from another tribe!!!!! See, the camp had a majority of people from a particular tribe and when they realised she was from the “enemy tribe”!!!!!!! They violently confronted her, shouting insults at her. Fear flowed through her veins. Fortunately security officers were nearby and quickly came to her rescue. As she walked away she knew that her work had been cut out for her. The next day, she woke up early and went to work. Due to security reasons she was transferred to a different camp were she worked for one month, a camp that had a majority from her tribe!!!!! The next month, they received orders that the government had laid them off.

‘There is no money to support this project,” they said, thus those most affected from the violence that the politicians had perpetuated, were left to heal themselves the best way they knew how.

This is the story of my mother. I decided to tell this story after I received and email of an article that explained why civil war is inevitable in Kenya. The writer claimed that if something is not done soon, and if the attitude of individuals does not change, then civil war is inevitable in Kenya. I am a member of a youth professionals club, where we discuss online various issues that affect our country, our continent and our world. In one of our discussions, the conversation took a different twist, comments like these started following in:

“Maybe u r one of the Kenyans being protected by a corrupt government. You too will be taken care of in 2013, mark my words, 2013.…. Kuleni tu mpasuke matumbo, lakini mtapasuliwa tukishaingia huko…”(IN ENGLISH: just eat till your stomachs explodes, we will tear you when we get in)

“A member of the forum wrote after he his friend told him that he had been given a ride by a politician from his tribe: “Kumbe (So) you are not a heathen”. “Heathen”???”

The list of conversation was longer. The term “you people” in Kenya means people from a one tribe, a different tribe. Now this is a group of young professionals, having such a conversation. The writer was worried that with such lines of thought civil war in Kenya is inevitable. Though I do not agree with the writer that civil war in Kenya is inevitable, I appreciated the point raised. There is a problem.

A lecturer confessed to me early this year that I do not behave like most people from my tribe. This is after I had spent many days in hospital looking after a close friend of mine. She happened to be from a different tribe from mine, and the lecturer, was surprised that I could care for her so deeply. “People from your tribe, do not act like you,” he said. A Lecturer!!!

So as I read the article, I remembered the ordeal that happened to my mother, and the words told to me by my former lecturer. I realised those affected most by the violence were not denied psychological help, and were left to deal with their emotions the best way they knew how, which in my opinion is very dangerous. Do you know that we still have internally displaced persons in Kenya? One year down the line!!! Yet you will not hear about them any more. The media now concentrates on politics as voiced by the politicians, ooh! and the political drama in Kenya is very intriguing.

I recently saw a documentary on one of the international television stations, telling a story of women who after being affected by the violence were trying to survive and rebuilt their lives, by advocating for peace at least among themselves, as a group of women. But it is not easy even for them.
At the end of the documentary the journalist asked one of the women who had just joined the group if she had forgiven, “How do you forgive someone who has taken away our home, “ she replied; a home that took her years to build. That is why she had joined the group to learn how to deal with her anger and pain, yet not many have this opportunity.

Please let us work on peace, whatever the cost, lest us work for peace!!