Raise awareness of unscrupulous scammers

How deep is your love? Read as…how deep is your pocket?

Scammers, fraudsters, and other crooks at online dating platforms and other communicators such as Skype, Messenger, etc.

First, the profile. Handsome, young to a middle-aged man with a beautiful smile, looking directly at you. Sometimes there are few more pictures with nice backgrounds to impress you, and to enhance reality. It almost screams “I am real”!!! Look at me!!! I am here just for you!!!

Though not all of them are “twisted” in their minds - don’t get me wrong - just about 98%.

His profile may state it or not, sometimes it comes out in the private chat.

The usual scenario: I am a widower with a teenage son or daughter. I am working at the oil platform as an engineer (that’s one of the recent examples) a doctor, a contractor, etc., in a foreign country. Possibilities are endless, it depends on their imagination and what might be more appealing to you. My child lives away at a boarding school.

First few messages are completely innocent, an icebreaking conversation: “How are you?” and “Where are you from?”. Of course, you are honest, and you are expecting the same from a prospect man. Gradually, you are revealing your location, profession, family status, etc. In return, he is kind, sweet and open (you think!). He tells you what you want to hear: you are beautiful, and you are the one he is missing in his life. He is looking for loving, carrying woman like you, who will love him and his child unconditionally. Few more chats and you are “jumping” hearing every single message notification. You melt reading every single word he sends you, like: “I have found my perfect woman and I have felt THE LOVE immediately. I know you are for me and I am for you, I miss you already.”

He is the masters of sweet compliments, soothing words that are healing your recently or not, broken heart, wrecked by the one (husband, partner, etc.), who left you devastated with self-esteem below “zero”.  He is building rapport, gaining your trust, and convincing you, that you are deserving the best: his love, care and whatever you dream of - he knows you well by now.

Trust me, I have been there, and I saw and chatted with them too. In my case, the whole thing stopped right after the chat turned into a scenario like the one below.

Once you are giving him verbal signals, that you are “in”, crazy in love and ready to do anything for him, “the drama” starts. For example, His son’s or daughter’s laptop has broken, the poor child needs it immediately. He can’t send the money now, because his contract has not finished yet, etc. He is asking you to HELP HIM! He will pay you back A.S.A.P and so on. He is not asking for much, it is just $1500. You are so good, so caring, so much loved by him and in love with him that you are willing to help immediately.

Now, does it ring a bell? Any red flags? No? Do you need more “drama”?

Here is some more then: “ I have to pay an extra ($ 5000) for my security because it is so dangerous here (usually somewhere in Africa), but I have to deliver contracted oil (usually worth $10.000.000) for my client. If I don’t I am going to lose everything. I am begging you, my love, I have to be protected here, for you, for my child, for us, etc. As soon I finish this contract I will pay you and I will be with you”. Anything outstanding in this scenario?

You are emotional and act on the spot: “OMG! I have to help him, protect him for our future, for love, for his kid! I am a good human being (here my dear up till this point you are absolutely right about yourself) and I cannot deny any help for this sweet, kind, loveable man. I do not have much, but I will get the right sum for him to save him, to save us”.

BOOM! Money sent! BOOM! His profile disappeared! He faded in the fog! How on the earth?

You are back to reality, even darker than before you started this “relationship”. On top of your emotional disturbance, self-esteem below absolute “zero” (-273.15 degrees as per Kalvin’s scale), you have financial issues by now and you have to repay the loan!

Let me tell you this: you are not alone! There are millions of women in the world who are falling “in love” with scammers every day, more, every minute!!! The numbers are alarming, those scammers made an estimate of £62.000.000 only in 2020.

Seriously, it makes me scream OMG! You are beautiful, adorable, loveable, caring, sweet woman, a human being who deserves the best care, love, money and happiness in the world. You shouldn’t pay a nickel for any of that because real love is priceless.

Disclaimer: This case study has been created for public use. The information contained in this case study can be used as a case study example by anyone interested in this topic.  The information in the case study is a personal experience of Ewa Babicka. Opinions formulated by the author are intended to warn others. Similarities of any sort are accidental but may look familiar due to a wide range of those acting unlawfully, and because the scenario of their actions has hardly changed over the last 10 years.