VOF Week 3: (Worst Nightmare)

VOF Week 3: (Worst Nightmare)

I really enjoy this citizen journalism thing and eagerly looked forward to the next assignment. When I saw it was about blogs I felt such dread. I pictured blogs as boring things where a person talks about themselves a lot and I have better things to do with my time when online. I wished it was something easy like our journals. But I really wanted to finish this just to say I did so gritted my teeth and tried to keep an open mind. I let my imagination run wild when thinking of new ideas I want to express and tried to picture me doing a blog.

I thought a catchy title for this blog would be ‘Proudly Prehistoric, Baby’ since I want people to remember how they were before others began writing their history for them. I had one friend who said “oh you are New Age” when talking about my spiritual feelings. I laughed and said “No, it is actually prehistoric, baby.” But trying to picture what on earth I could say that would be interesting each day I gave myself a headache.

My biggest challenge is not thinking I understand things so easily since I had not realized my journal here at Pulsewire was an example of a blog. I think I would have dropped out or skipped this assignment since my first thought was ‘well, I could write one about the evils of blogging’ as my point of view for this assignment. How it was a way to get you to think you are really connecting when it is only the illusion of really knowing that person. But when I realized my journal was a blog I really embrace this idea.

My biggest barrier is my low self-esteem where I have to fight the feeling that my thoughts and ideas are worthless and practically have to force my finger to hit the submit button. I think it happens with a lot of woman and that is why I do write them, I want them to know they are not alone and we are here and know what it is like since we have experienced something like it ourselves. That we want to make the world a better place and the way to do that is by letting each woman discover for herself that she is worthwhile and creating a positive image for herself that will spread throughout her community and the world.

So here I find myself an International blogger and loving the experience. If I can help even just one woman find a better life for herself then it is worth those few minutes I have to conquer and battle my feelings of fear and dread. Like discovering that a blog is not the bad thing I thought it was, I hope that a woman reading this will also discover she is not as bad as she thought she was!